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'Workaholics' recap: You have to beat the system on the inside like rappers with vaginas
Workaholics [Season 3 Episode 3]
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In this episode of the Workaholics the guys try getting a handicap pass for their car using Adam's handicapped cousin. This was a hilarious episode filled with laugh out loud jokes.

Guys trash the old office

When the guys come into work they find it completely empty. Alice calls Ders and asks them why they're not at work and tells them that they moved to a new office.

They start trashing the place because of how much they hated it. They spray paint penises, smash the walls and pee all over the place.

Then Alice calls Ders back and tells him to make sure to let the inspector in because she wants her $8000 deposit back. Ders then says that they're not at the office.

"We're not at the old office. We're watching the old Office, the Tv show, in the car on an iPad on our way to the new office." - Ders

No parking spaces at the new office

As they drive up to the new office there's no parking lot and they see two handicapped parking spaces. They wonder why when they only have one handicapped person who works at the office.

"I wish I was handicapped. Those dudes are so lucky." - Adam

When they get in they ask Alice why there's no parking spaces. Adam says when they get in at 10:00 there's not going to be anything available.

"So why don't you scratch our butts a little bit and give us the bonus handicap spot." - Blake

Alice then says that work starts at 9:00 am and starts Slamming the keyboard saying that's her writing a letter to give them parking spaces.

"Give parking to idiots, change tampon, kill self." - Alice

Jillian, the office manager, calls Anders telling him that someone is giving him a ticket. He runs outside and the parking enforcement just drives off and he starts freaking out. The guys go after him.

"Chill out buddy you're gonna bust a nut and I'm not talking that good kind." - Blake

Adam tells him to throw it away and make believe like he never got it because that's what he did on his STD test. Ders says,

"You can't do that. That's like socially dangerous."

They make up a disease to get handicap spots

In the office, Ders tells them that his ticket is going to cost $60 and Blake says, "You know how many corn dogs we can buy with $60??"

"Alice, she clogs up the parking lot arteries with all these handicapped spots where regular people can't even park. It's all mutant parking." - Adam

Anders starts wondering how Drake handles his entire fleet of cars. Adam says that he's "from a lawless country. There's no laws" referring to Canada. Adam says they have to beat the system in the US and get handicapped parking tickets.

"You have to beat the system on the inside like rappers with vaginas because they beat them" - Adam

Ders starts asking if there's any disease they an make up to get the handicapped tickets. Adam says he can get his cousin to work there and use his pass but then Adam says that his handicapped cousin can't even walk up stairs.

They talk to Devin, Adams handicapped cousin

It's all dark and then Devin surprises them in his wheelchair and says,

"Truck knocks me 40 feet into a brick wall... now we're ballin off government checks like Obama bin Laden."

He starts beatboxing and Adam starts dancing and tells them to call him "big fat" when Adam introduces him as Devin. He tells jokes like, "oops I dropped some weight, oh there it is pick it up" and has Adam put it back on him.

Adam holds Devins breast and says:

"It feels like a real woman's boob. Blake get in there." - Adam

They try convincing Devin to take a job

When they try convincing Devin to work for Telamericorp, he doesn't get why and starts talking about how he lives his life chillin in the house paying Xbox live and watching Tv.

"You're gangster man. You're like Rick Ross with extra sauce." - Blake

"You're like a one man g-uniiiit." - Adam

They start making fun of Ders saying he has a small dick and he gets up and pulls down his pants saying he's tired of it showing off his dick. He sits down and says that his dick is bigger than the cat's.

"Would you help a brother out that's actually just cousin, just cause, my brother." - Adam

Devin says that they can just have his pass, but he doesn't want to work. His mom comes downstairs yelling at him saying he should take the job and that his disability insurance is going to run out and she doesn't want him "masturbating his life away."

They finally park in the handicapped spot

They come to work and park in the handicapped spot and start ballin all excited about it. They forget Devin in the car and he yells saying that he's stuck because he's too fat.

In the kitchen, Devin says that there's no way he's clocking in. Adam pinches him in the stomach and says "Stay fat bro"

Devin hits on a female employee

"Some butt you got there... Do you wipe it, but seriously can I?" then he says, "Let me start over. Do you wanna suck my tits."

Devin eats Montez's yogurt

When Montez hears about Devin eating his yogurt he gets pissed, goes into the kitchen and is about to fight Devin.

When Alice walks in with Jillian, Devin appears to be attracted to he apologizes.

Alice asks "What is this?" referring to Devin and the guys ask her to give him a job. She's ok with it but tells them to train him.

After everyone leaves, Devin starts hitting on the other female employee whose polite and they start talking about cats. He invites over to his place.

Devin storms off

While Ders tries to train Devin, Devin doesn't want to work or do anything. He gets pissed off and walks off saying he's taking his pass with him. They try stopping him.

Ders say he doesn't care saying he'll take the bus or park on the street. Adam asks Devin what he's going to do when the disability insurance stops.

They come up with the idea to get him hurt at work so he collects workers compensation.

Guys wants to throw Devin from the stairs so he can collect workers compensation

Devin agrees to do it after Ders calls him a p*ssy.

They put a garbage can on his head and push him down but he doesn't break anything.

Jillian walks in on them and Ders tells her the truth about what they want to do. Get him workers compensation in exchange for his handicap pass. She tells him that he's getting another ticket.

Anders is getting another parking ticket

When he runs outside and sees the ticket he ins back around and Ella at Devin saying its his fault.

"I'm gonna rip off your breasts and use them as cereal bowls." - Ders

A street sweeper starts approaching Ders without him realizing. Devin runs and pushes Ders out of the way.

Devin breaks his leg. Now he really gets workers compensation and he gives them the pass.

The guys lose their handicapped spot again

They're super excited driving to work with the handicapped pass, but when they arrive there's a car parked in the second handicap spot.

They talk to Alice but she says when they said they didn't need it she gave it to someone else.

She tells them to get back to work that she cant deal with it today because some homeless people broke into the old office and trashed it. They get nervous and leave.

"Those homeless people, a foul breed." - Adam